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Liberal Tears Vodka Recipes

BooHoo Bloody Mary


  • 2 Oz of Liberal Tears Vodka

  • Dash of Worcestershire Sauce to keep the Liberals away.

  • Pepper, horseradish & lemon juice to taste

  • 4 Oz of Tomato Juice made in the USA

  • Lemon slice

  • Crisp bacon strip

  • Celery Stalk

  • Peeled, Cooked Shrimp


  • Shake until the last democrat finally leaves the election process

  • Pour over ice in a tall glass

  • Garnish with an American flag toothpick in stuffed olives

  • Enjoy every morning after each Conservative victory

  • Add in your fresh lemon slice, bacon, shrimp and top it off with the celery stalk



  • 2 oz of Liberal Tears Vodka

  • 4 oz of ginger beer made in the USA

  • 3 lime wedges squeezed well like when Pelosi puckers her lips while in-camera at the SOTU

  • Lime slice


  • Shake until Hillary’s smile disappears

  • Pour over ice made with good ole Philly water

  • Serve in a Kamala-Kold copper, mined in Arizona, mug

  • Add a lime slice to garnish

TrunkTini and TrunkTini with Olives


  • Add 2 oz of Liberal Tears Vodka

  • One quarter ounce of dry, conservative vermouth made in Napa

  • Hot pepper that reminds you of Chuck Schumer’s smile


  • Grab your silver (mined in Nevada) martini shaker and fill with Bucks county ice

  • Stir in shaker until Biden regains his sanity


  • No hot pepper

  • Add olives stuffed with garlic to keep the evil liberals at bay. (see vampire retardant)

  • See stirring above, unless you want to drink it this decade

Pelosi Punch


  • 6 Oz of Liberal Tears Vodka

  • 6 Oz of Hawaiian punch

  • 3 Oz of Pineapple & Orange juice

  • Sliced lime, oranges, black cherries & lemons


  • Now, rip up this recipe with an elitist smirk & scowl on your lips, while facing America on TV behind our President

  • Take a Right-Handed Red wooden spoon and blend your concoction with vigor

  • Add the sliced lime, oranges, black cherries & lemons to a long flowered tooth pick

  • Lastly, pour the entire pitcher contents into the sink & down the drain, since nothing “good” can come from Madame Pelosi

The Pink Socialist


  • Use NO quantity of Liberal Tears Vodka

  • Use 2 Oz of Vermont moonshine made illegally by DACA members

  • A smidgen of rosemary infused simple syrup

  • 4 OZ of pink grapefruit juice

  • Pink grapefruit wedges

  • Rosemary sprigs


  • Add rosemary infused simple syrup to pink grapefruit juice

  • Garnish with rosemary sprig & wedge of pink grapefruit

  • Serve on ice

  • It’s FREE. Don’t charge money for it

  • Remember, Socialists don't pay for anything 

Democrat Delay Disgusting Dessert


  • 12 oz of Liberal Tears Vodka

  • Pint of $12 ice cream kept frozen in a $25,000 freezer

  • Cinnamon stick


  • Melt the ice cream in a large container and add the Liberal Tears

  • Shake until Biden apologizes to Tara Reade

  • Now fly the mixture in a private jet, provided by USA taxpayers, from Chinatown San Francisco castle to the Wilmington, DE bunker of a certain candidate

  • Add in the cinnamon stick

  • Hand it to the lady of the house named Jill, since Joe “never answers the door”

The GBA (God Bless America)


  • ½ oz of Liberal Tears Vodka

  • ½ oz of grenadine

  • ½ oz of blue curacao


  • In a tall glass filled with ice, pour in the red grenadine

  • Now carefully float a spoon over top and slowly layer the blue curacao over the back of the spoon

  • Lastly, float the Liberal Tears Vodka over the back of the spoon slowly to complete the 3 layers of red, white & blue

  • Serve to your favorite conservative or make several for a group to toast cheers to our great country

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